deeper than i'm shaken by the violence of existing

Why do we try to describe our most intense feelings? What is it that pushes us to purge thoughts and feelings into words, music, art of any kind. Abstract verbage and metaphores meaningful only to ourselves. Is this the worst kind of self-gratification? Can this selfish expulsion even be measured? or does it just exist as we do? with no answers to give or receive. only the surrender of self-inflicted imprisonment. In our world of blogs and webpages and messenger is it any wonder that we are all hyper aware of each other's psychosis'? and neurosis'? Is it any wonder that we analyze everything to death? It seems to me that the relationships between people have become a giant emotional game of rock, paper, scissors. It began as everyone in it for mutual enjoyment, going with whatever gesture popped into their respective heads and followed to their hands. Now it has evolved into a strategic competition. One must always be a step ahead of the opponent, guessing from the last hand, what the next move will be and thus one's counter move. As we all know, most people fumble when they try to strategize at rock, paper, scissors. As they do in relationship strategizing. Hmm. It is for this reason that I don't like competition. I like a formidable opponent and a challenge, don't get me wrong. I don't, however, appreciate the aggression of competition. I like everyone to have that feeling of accomplishment that comes with winning. I prefer not to keep score. I prefer to talk to each person in a crowd to make sure that no one feels they were left out. I like to read people's blogs and post positive comments because i know how much i love it when people read mine. And i like to purge my thoughts and feelings in words, here and in other forums. using abstract words and metaphores meaningful only to me.